Surgery

Seriously, do you guys hate me? I would hate me with all the lousy no-postings about anything. I'm a little depressed right now because it seems like everyone I went to college with is announcing that they are pregnant and already in the second trimester. Out of my closer circle of six girl friends - four are pregnant, one is divorced and one is still single. Two out of my three long term debate partners in college are having babies. I'm beginning to feel left out in addition to everything else. Mother's Day was rough, y'all. My pastor called attention in church to those who want to be mothers but it isn't happening right now. And no one recognizes me as a mother, possibly because I was only pregnant for like 4 days. But it still happened, right? I want to cling to that but I feel silly doing so for so many reasons.

Anyway, enough wallowing, want to hear about my surgery?

My mom came down for the surgery fun times. I went in to a hospital about an hour away. They gave me this awesome hospital gown that they connect a hose too and it funnels warm air right to your body. I need one of these at homes. They gave me something to "take the edge off" before they gave me the hard stuff and seriously, the last thing I remember is seeing my husband and mom and then I woke up. Like, I didn't even make it to the infamous count down on the gas. No memory.

They took out a polyp in my uterus (no big deal the doctor says, but why leave it in?) and found my tubes were "circuitous" and "thin-walled" but mostly okay. Then they drilled the ever loving hell out of my ovaries in the hopes that they would respond. (I am now on day 10 of the next cycle and I can tell you my ovaries are stubborn as hell and don't seem to be responding to crapton of swift kicks to their tiny, tiny asses.)

So I wake up and they are immediately shoving giner ale down my throat and crackers. All I have to do is pee and I can go home. The surgery was at 10:00 a.m. and I was out by noon. My husband even promised me a snow cone at home (my absolute favorite in all the world) and the place closed at 6:00. We all thought it was no big deal.

2:00, 4:00, 6:00 (there goes that snow cone), 8:00 ... 9:00. By this time I have had a ton of IV fluids and regular fluids and just can not pee. I would sit on the toilet and sort of feel the need in the abstract sense, but could not make myself go. I find out later they told my mom in the hall way that if I don't pee it could be life threatening. So glad I did not know that at the time.

Then they try to put a catheter in me. They say I can go home with a catheter or stay in the hospital overnight. So I wanted to try the catheter, obvs. I wanted to go home so bad. So they try to put the catheter in. I don't know what it is, but that area has always been SUPER SENSITIVE for me. And I just had surgery down there. So YOU KNOW, extreme pain. I was literally screaming and telling my husband I couldn't do it anymore. They tried putting the pediatric size in and were having trouble telling exactly where to put it. I thought he was going to drop kick one of the nurses. They get it ostensibly "in" but no pee comes out. Me thinks they did it wrong. Anyway, they decide it's so late (10:30 by this time) that I have to stay overnight anyway. And they give me some medicine to "relax" my bladder. When they wheel me up to my room (around 11) I feel like I REALLY HAVE TO GO LIKE RIGHT NOW but the catheter is actually preventing me from going. I get my nurse (Tammy on the floor, and God, do I love Tammy like no other) to take the catheter out (MUCH easier than going in) and finally pee.

Thank goodness! Only, now I have to get up like every half hour to pee (thanks medicine!) and they are measuring how much I pee (how embarassing) to make sure they don't have to put another catheter in (over my seriously dead body). I am also in a ton of pain, yay! So I was up all night. My husband and mom slept better in that hospital room than I did for sure. Also, Tammy rocked my face off with the pain medicine and the helping me pee. I even got a gold star on my door for peeing. I have never been so embarassed.

But we survived and I went home. Of course the pain medicine made it hard to go to the bathroom the other way, if you know what I mean. I ended up missing work a day because I had to go and couldn't go. Finally a suppository laxative got my mo jo going and if I never have this kind of complications with the toilet it will be too soon.

That was y'alls TMI for today. You're welcome. The surgery was April 9th and I had to be on birth control after that, had my follow up on May 6th which was pretend day 3 of this cycle (because I bled for like 2 weeks after the surgery even ON birth control so I never really got a "red flow") and I started drugs day . 225 units of follistim. Now on day 10 I have two follicles barely peeking over 1, and my nurse was kind enough to tell me that lots of girls have follicles over day 1 on their baseline day. So it doesn't look like this cycle will be any shorter. Sigh. Wonder if it will at least work...